


Together alone

by creativwritingmind



Series: Two [39]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: F/M, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-06
Updated: 2017-03-06
Packaged: 2018-09-28 16:51:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10140191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/creativwritingmind/pseuds/creativwritingmind





	

That it was never really cold in LA had been the cause for him to move there. That a night in the city of angels could leave him so cold inside was something Josh hadn't expected, but he knew well that it wasn't the outside temperature that threatened to freeze his soul. It was a first in months that he got back into the apartment he had purchased for more then a few days and definitly a first that no one had been there when he came back. There had always been Ashley, Colin or Jesse around, but with christmas coming in big steps they all were busy. 

Sighing the drummer pushed himself off the window sill he had been sitting on and shuffled into his kitchen to fill his empty mug with another coffee. He pondered to turn up music so he wouldn't feel so alone but decided that it would just make him realise how much he missed being on tour, so he walked back to his initial spot, snatching his phone in the process. 

Going through all his contacts Josh learned that, despite how many people he knew, there was a lack of persons who were like him – single, lonely, maybe even depressed on an evening like this. None of the contacts that flashed before his eyes were one to call in that situation and he hesitated to call Tyler as he felt as if the singer had earned a break from his pathetic complaining about feeling unloved. 

Scrolling further down, reaching the "R" section Josh stopped suddenly, his thumb hovering over the touchscreen, the name under it burning his skin without even being in contact. About a year ago she had been the one waiting for him when he came back. She had been there, with her smile and her warmth and the cute freckles on her nose. All attempts to forget her had failed, but at least he had been able to distance himself from his feelings for her...until this very moment, when his breath condensed on the window, when the beating of his own heart was too loud in the silence surrounding him. 

It had been a while since they talked, months even, although they never had lost their connection. There always had been a tweet here or a message there to make sure that the other did alright, but with her obviously finding someone new Josh had retreated from letting their conversations get too much. He still remembered the day he saw that pic...her stitting at a beach somewhere with a guy, kissing her jaw. It had hurted more then it should have done, after all he was over her, that's what he told all his friends. Tyler always said he knew better and that he should stop to betray himself, but Josh silenced him, got angry, and so they didn't bring up the topic anymore. 

On this december morning, feeling abandoned in a city with millions of people Josh realised that his friend had been right. He was not over Debby, he would probably never be. Somewhere in the aftermath of this epiphamy he had pressed his finger down on the phone it seemed, as the clear noise of the line ringing reached his ears. It was too late to stop it – she would see his number on her screen anyway – so Josh raised the pone to his ear and closed his eyes, silently praying that she would take up, not leave him hanging. 

And answer she did, after a few rings, with small, nearly audible breaths first, a calm, collected "Hello Joshua." then. "Hey." he nearly whispered, already feeling his insides warm up a bit just on her using his name like this. He always had treassured the way she refused to call him by his nickname. Some seconds of silence passed, but luckily she seemed determined to not let it get awkward as she sighed, a deep, liberating one that might have gone along with a smile. "You're home, aren't you?" "Came back yesterday." "Do you wanna meet?" 

Leaning his temple against the glas Josh pictured her sitting on her couch, crosslegged like she often did, playing with the beautiful, soft curls of her hair. "Yes. No. I...I'm not sure if it would be an good idea." He heared her shifting, knew that she pulled her knees up to her chest, wrapped her arm around them. "What are you afraid of?" It was hard to answer that without giving too much of his heart away, but deciding that she already posessed it whole Josh gave in. "Getting attached again." "Hm." He nearly could hear her think, feel her eyes getting smaller, her front crincled. 

"Maybe that wouldn't be such a bad thing after all." she said, after picking the words carefully. Josh did his best not to scoff on that, but the dissapointment bled through his voice anyway. "You're taken, Debby." Deep inhaling, a shaking of head on her side of the line. "I'm not." "You kissed him." "He kissed me. It meant nothing." "It doesn't matter." he assumed, desperate to end the discussion before it even started. "It's not my affair anymore." 

Dooming himself for calling her Josh felt his heart sinking as he heared her sniff, maybe shed tears. Fearing that everything he would add would just make it worse he stayed silent, gave her time to catch herself againg. Her voice was small, just like the one of a child. "I miss you Joshua. I miss you bad. It's just...I can live with missing you, knowing you're not mine. But I'm so tired of missing you while I'm with you. I'm done with waiting...do you understand that?" 

Nodding slightly, realising in the same moment that he did that she couldn't see it, he breathed a "Yeah.", simple and defeated. "I'm sorry." she gave broken, clearly crying now. "I'm even more." he stated, pressing his nails deep into the skin of his own wrist to find a deflection to his hearts pain. They shared the desperation then, for some moments, before she decided she couldn't take it anymore. "Merry Christmas, Joshua." she said, regaining controll on herself again, preparing to end their conversation. "Merry Christmas, Debby." he gave back, well knowing that he didn't sounded convincing at all. 

When she hung up all that stayed back was the feeling of being even more lonely then before, while he glanced out to the lights of the city below him.


End file.
